Twittering Does Not Fry the Bacon

One cooking expert who ain't even a cook is Mike Doe at http://twitter.com/mikedoe.

Toast Counts as Cooking

No matter what the cynics say, cooking toasts counts as cooking food.

Step 1: Buy bread
Step 2: Slice said bread, if unsliced*
Step 3: Plug in toaster
Step 4: Put bread in toaster
Step 5: Push lever thingy down on toaster
Step 6: Remove bread from toaster**
Step 7: Eat toast
Step 8: Celebrate your cooking success!

*Do not eat end pieces. End pieces are the dregs.
**Do not use a knife or other metal object. This could possibly hurt.

Turn on the Oven!!!!

It's amazing how often would-be-chefs forget to turn on the oven. Sad but true. Like Michael Jackson. And Bobby. Not so much Whitney.

Go to the Grocery Store...Right Now!

You can't even cook toast if you don't got any bread! So get to the grocery store and stock up! Now! It almost doesn't matter what you buy, as long as it's not junk food! Just load up! Otherwise you can't cook a darn thing...and you'll end up eating at MacDonald's again!

Empty refrigerators are EVIL!

Grocery store...go now!

How to Cook Food...Pork Chops with Onions

Click here for more on "How to Cook Pork Chops with Carmelized Onions"

How to Cook Food...Challah Bread

Click here for more on "How to Bake a Traditional Challah Bread"

How to Cook Food...with Doe-Nuts!

Just wanted to announce that How to Cook Food has been selected to join the Doe-Nuts network of blogs, loosely (and unofficially) connected to comedian Mike Doe! Woo ooh!

My fellow Doe-Nuts include:
Doe-Nuts
Great MMA Fights
How to Be a Bartender
How to Cook Food
Funny Female Comics
Funny Bloggers
Darn Funny Videos
Darn Funny Books
Darn Funny Movies
Funny Standup Comics

It's a proud day for us and we just wanted to say thanks again for your support...and keeping it real!